In which I petition the Earth to do me a solid
Dear Earth,
If ever there was a time to open up at my feet and swallow me whole, tonight would be it.
Thanks much,
Kathy
Dear Kathy,
Two things:
1. If the Earth’s too busy, work on dropping dead from utter mortification.
2. Since you KNOW your husband has band practice on Tuesdays and Wednesdays, TRY not to walk from the bedroom to the bathroom in a tshirt and underwear. It’ll save you a shitload of mortification.
Love,
Kathy
Dear whoever was in the main part of the house when I was walking from the bedroom to the bathroom in just a tshirt and underwear,
NEVER TALK OF THIS. EVER. I don’t want to know who you were, or whether you actually saw me. I’m just going to pretend it never happened, and work on getting swallowed by the Earth.
Thanks,
Kathy
BLIX said,
September 22, 2010 at 6:52 pm
Oh noes! At least you weren’t totally nekkid.
kayeffjay said,
September 22, 2010 at 7:04 pm
There is that!
Heather / Eyeconic said,
September 22, 2010 at 10:15 pm
Some lady walked in on me at Kohls when I was trying on bras once… full boobage flash! Also, at my old house we had a fenced backyard, so I was tanning topless only to realize then that there were guys working on the roof. I was probs 14 so it was super embarassing.
BETTER story: My friend was in a rental condo in Florida for vacation, this was when she was probably… 15, maybe 16. She was getting cereal and just walking around in a pair of undies, nothing else at all. There was some yardwork or pool guy or something outside just staring at her through the sliding glass door, hahaha.
Also embarassing! My other friend was hooking up with her boyfriend in a parking garage when the cops came and they got in trouble! And then my OTHER friend had the same thing happen to her in the same parking garage a few weeks later… muahaha.
kayeffjay said,
September 22, 2010 at 10:36 pm
Oh, those are funny and yet not funny at the same time. :S
I have a couple stories of my own, not that I think about it, but I think I’m going to put them on the front page to share with everyone. Because I like telling embarrassing stories about myself, truth be told.
I think if I had to choose, I’d prefer the Kohl’s scenario, though. I’d be a bit embarrassed, but not terribly, since it’s a dressing room. Dudes on the roof catching me sunbathing? It would take me much longer to get over that.
Sorcia MacNasty said,
September 23, 2010 at 7:54 am
BWAHAHAHAHA!!
God, I love being naked. The weirder the circumstances, the better. Make the other person feel awkward. You’re wandering around only half nude in your OWN house. Suck it up, band member, and appreciate the free floor show. Master the art of nonchalantly putting a hand on your hip and saying, “Whut?”
kayeffjay said,
September 23, 2010 at 3:18 pm
Ah shit, you crack me up. And I definitely love owning a home, so I can be starkers whenever I want to. But I still have that “Oh god, who just saw my undies?” reflex. Speaking of which…I should go type up the most recent incident. It was pretty awesome.